A couple of days ago, I blogged about something that I heard Oprah say on her first Lifeclass – The Tour show that has motivated me to make some changes in my life. I’ve decided to embark upon what I have termed my I Did That Thing project. (This idea was also partially inspired by a book that I am reading called The Happiness Project, where Gretchen Rubin documents her year-long effort to create a happier life for herself – come back soon for a full review of the book.)
This quote, which proved to be a kick in the butt for me, wasn’t the only thing that I took away from the LIfeclass show. During the show, a man name Steve was featured. Steve had been an alcoholic and drug addict for many years. He had managed to get himself clean and had been sober for 10 years, but still wasn’t as successful as he wanted to be (no steady job, living with his daughter) and this disappointment was beginning to weigh on him – so much so that he feared relapsing. It took Iyanla three minutes to break down his issue. “You are addicted to your story”, she told him. The crowd immediately responded with a “Whoa!”. It was obvious to everyone that she had hit the nail on the head.
Iyanla went on to explain that often what holds people back from achieving their goals or living the kind of life they can be proud of is that they hypnotize themselves by constantly telling their “story” or excuse about why they can’t achieve something.
So, as I get started with my I Did That Thing project, I decided to consider the story that I’ve been telling myself. My story goes something like this…
I am a wife and mother of two active children who has a full time job so my time is limited. I don’t have the time to pursue the things that would allow me to live purposefully. Additionally, my husband doesn’t push me to achieve my goals and I need his support to be able to do the things I really want to do in life.
After explaining how our stories hold us back, Iyanla said that we must “state the facts and speak the truth”. In other words, we do have to acknowledge the facts about our particular situation, but we also must be truthful about it.
Here are the FACTS…
I am a wife and a mother of two active children, so my time is limited. My husband wants me to be happy.
And the TRUTH…
I can find the time in my day for the things that I choose to make a priority. If my goals are truly a priority, I must eliminate those activities that do not align with the vision I have for my life. Additionally, I can’t expect my husband to take on my goals for my life as his own nor can I expect him to motivate me – I must do that for myself.
Can you say BREAKTHROUGH?!?