I know I said that I would post a full review of Daring Greatly by Brene’ Brown and I will eventually (promise!), but I keep running across nuggets of goodness in this book that I just have to share. I have had so many ‘a-ha’ moments while reading this book that I have literally lost count. One was around the truth that when we constantly prepare ourselves to be prepared for the worst (so that we aren’t too disappointed) or numb ourselves so that we don’t feel deep disappointment/sadness , we rob ourselves from being able to experience “foreboding joy”.
Have you ever chastised yourself for being too emotional or allowing a situation or a person to ‘get to you’. Or worse, have you gotten on to your child for crying about a situation. I think we often start very early teaching our children, and reinforcing within ourselves, the need to put on virtual armor to defend ourselves from feeling too much. I find myself doing it with my son from time to time – “Why are you crying about that? Be a big boy!”. Now don’t get me wrong, there is such a thing as whining/crying to get your way, which he is too big for…that isn’t what I’m talking about.
While on the surface being strong and tough and un-hurtable may seem like a great thing to aspire to. But is it worth it if it prevents us from fully experiencing the opposite of hurt/disappointed? I am beginning to think not.
The truth is that sh*t happens and people will disappoint you. And, when something crummy happens and you want to cry about it, just do it!